- View from behind me, pre-transition, sitting on the couch with an Apple TV remote on the armrest. In front of me i a TV on a TV stand with two bookshelf speakers. On the TV screen, two women lay with their heads touching, smiling softly with their eyes gently closed.
- Close up of my pre-transition face, my expression sad longing with glistening eyes. In a speech bubble, I am saying: I want that.
- Wide angle of me sitting on the couch, the remote in my hand and my legs crossed, gesturing with my other hand as I say: Why do lesbian relationships just feel more... right to me?
- Close-up of the top of my bald head from behind, with an Apple TV screen in the background with a number of app icons. YouTube is highlighted. I say: Well, now that that show's over, I'll watch some YouTube.
- On the TV, a man gestures behind a pause icon with some shelves and a wall-mounted YouTube play button behind him. At the bottom of the panel, I say: Oh yeah, I was watching this video by a trans guy.
- The same man gestures and looks like he's saying something casually serious. The play button is on the wall behind him. He says: And then there was the GENDER DYSPHROIA. The words GENDER DYSPHORIA are wavy as if they are being emphasized in a playfully scary way.
- Back to the wideshot of me holding the remote. I say: You know, I've never quite understood what gender dysphoria is. I should look up how real trans people describe it.
- Close-up of my phone screen, angled with the top away from the camera. At the top of the panel, I say: Genderdysphoria.fyi? I guess I'll check it out before bed. On the phone screen is a Reddit comment section. The comment most legibile on the screen says: You should check out to this site: genderdysphoria.fyi
It's been a while since my last update...
To be honest, I kind of lost interest in doing this project the further I got into my transition. Especially early on when I was extra sensitive to dysphoria, I did not want to spend a bunch of time drawing myself pre-transition, but also it's kind of boring because it's just me alone trying stuff out, talking to people on my phone, etc.
Even when I eventually come out to people, all the interesting parts are just on my phone, so it's kind of a boring thing to draw. I'm not sure how much of this I actually want to cover now, but I had this one partially cleaned up and one more roughly sketched from the first day I started making this comic, so I'm going to release these two, and we'll see if I want to cover more of it once I'm at that point.
Really, I'd like to move on to some fiction comics instead, so we'll see, I guess. Maybe I'll pivot this into something else but idk. I'm kind of ready to move on at this point and not spend so much time thinking about my past.